


Not Your Mother's Sex Change

by melagan



Category: Stargate Atlantis
Genre: Genderswap, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-04-12
Updated: 2010-04-12
Packaged: 2017-10-10 21:23:10
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,326
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/104426
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/melagan/pseuds/melagan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>John and Rodney have their own guyish ways of handling Rodney's sudden change into a woman.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Not Your Mother's Sex Change

**Author's Note:**

  * For [kashmir](https://archiveofourown.org/users/kashmir/gifts).



This was so not what John was expecting. Not at all.

He supposed if he thought about it, he was expecting a major McKay wigg-out. Something involving hand waving and swearing, possibly even a refusal to come out of the bathroom without John's reassurances that they were completely alone. Maybe, and this was John's secret hope, he'd find Rodney designing a bomb that would turn the sex change temple into itty bitty pieces of rubble.

It was the third sex change temple they'd run across this month. John was getting damned tired of seeing Lorne, and the other men, grabbing their 'boys' the minute they were back through the gate, checking that everything was where it belonged. John would have made a rule against it, but he'd done it himself.

There were just some things a man needed the comfort of knowing. ASAP.

But even seeing Lorne, with his hands down his pants and whimpering in relief, couldn't top the sight in front of John now.

Of all the scenarios playing in John's head, nothing had prepared him for walking into McKay's quarters and seeing his best friend waving a pair of scissors in one hand and a pair of boxers in the other.

The one tiny button on the black silk shirt Rodney was wearing was doing nothing to hide his new and ample bosom. John gave it thirty seconds, or one more bounce, before that one popped off from the strain and joined the others on the floor. Not that he -- Bingo. That button had never stood a chance.

"Silk, McKay?" John was manfully trying not to notice how the shirttails skimmed Rodney's thighs. They swayed with every movement Rodney made, leaving tantalizing glimpses of his best friend's- not so male anymore - bits. Private bits. _Womanly _bits. Jesus, Rodney was a natural blond. Who knew? John licked his lips, and then prayed to god that Rodney hadn't noticed.

"Teyla says, and I quote, 'You cannot change this. Would it not be wise embrace your new femininity?' And then she handed me this shirt." Rodney held a pinch of silk between elegant fingers. "I swear, John, if it had been Heightmeyer, I would have had a lot to say, but it's Teyla. She patted my arm and looked at me. Of course, I took the damn thing and put it on."

John nodded. His mouth had gone dry and he'd given up on trying not to stare. The best he could hope for was now was to keep from embarrassing himself, which was looking more unlikely by the minute.

Rodney was gorgeous. He was curved in places that nearly begged an invitation to sin. His hands, while finer boned, were still the same shape. So were his shoulders and John found that strangely comforting. This was his buddy with his, no, her, crooked, mouth, blue eyes, and incredible ass. That hadn't changed.

"So, Rodney, why are you waving your boxers around instead of wearing them? Isn't it a little drafty?" Yeah, that sounded cool. John rubbed at the back of his neck and tried to bring his gaze back up to Rodney's face.

"Don't even go there. Do you have any idea how wide my hips are now?"

John swallowed and sat down on the edge of the bed -- on his hands. He sang a 'do not touch' mantra in the back of his brain. Fuck. McKay would kill him if he knew what he was thinking.

Rodney flashed the scissors in front of John's face." I'm cutting the sides out of my boxers so that I can wear them. The way it is now I can barely get them up to my thighs, let alone over my ass."

"Why don't you just get some, um, ladies panties?" John winced. This was a conversation he'd never thought he'd have with McKay, at least not under these circumstances.

"And how exactly do I do that? The Daedalus isn't due for six weeks and it's not like I can go around Atlantis and ask the girls to lend me their undies. What am I going to do, offer to return them later slightly used? Trust me, that's only going to get my face slapped."

"You mumbled that last part. What did you say Rodney?"

"I said, 'It didn't work in college either.' Can we move on now, please?"

Sure, as far as John was concerned, they could move on. He just didn't know where to.

Every once in awhile, Rodney would have passing show of modesty and try to grip the sides of his shirt together. That lasted about as long as his next enthusiastic jab with the scissors. Then the shirt would fall open and John had his own personal peep show. A damn good peep show. It was all his and no one else had better even think of peeping. John would have blinked in surprise at those thoughts, if it had been worth tearing his eyes away for even a second

"So you. With the naked. You're a little exposed there, McKay."

"I know. I expected to be alone in my room, not," Rodney waved a hand at John, "entertaining.

"I'm trying to acclimatize before we get hit with the next crisis. Everything moves differently. My center of balance is off, my hands are too small, and my god damn dick is gone." Rodney sighed. "This seemed the most expedient way. We can't afford for me stopping to ogle my own damn breasts in the middle of a Wraith attack. Not that I would, but you know what I mean."

John just nodded. He did know what Rodney meant. In a life or death situation, a two second distraction could mean the difference between acquiring the target or getting shot down.

"It's worse than distraction under fire. My brain isn't working right either. I've always been able to left brain focus. My ability to concentrate and work the problem has saved our asses. A lot. But now, my right side brain is trying to get into the act. It makes perfect sense that Cadman can build bombs and tap dance. She can probably do it at the same time." Rodney narrowed his eyes at John. "Please, never tell her I said that.

"And then there's this." Rodney cupped two hands around his right breast, lifting it tenderly before continuing. "I… I shut myself in a drawer this morning. I'm a physicist and I forgot about _gravity_. It still hurts.

"John, are you okay? You look a little flushed. Oh, no, this is freaking you out, isn't it? You're my best friend. I don't think I can get through this without you."

John cleared his throat, and his voice still came out sounding like gravel. "Urgghh." Fortunately, that seemed to be enough for Rodney.

"Seriously, you can not flake out on me. I haven't even gotten to the part where I have a vagina. What the hell am I supposed to do with that?"

John's eyebrows hitched up even higher and he could taste the blood in his mouth where he'd bitten his tongue.

Rodney continued, waving a slightly less frantic hand in John's direction. "I mean, I'd know what to do if it were your vagina."

"Rodney. Stop. Do you mean you'd _ want_ to do something with it, if I had one?"

"Well, yes. In fact, I have a whole list of things…somewhere." Rodney's gaze slid over to his laptop then darted back to John as he shifted nervously on his feet.

"Oh." John said. "Um. I wouldn't be adverse to say, trying out some of those ideas. With you, I mean, on you."

Rodney stared at him. "You'd do that? You wouldn't laugh?"

"God, no. I. No. I wouldn't laugh, Rodney. I swear." John got up and put his hand on Rodney's shoulder, his thumb brushing under the silk collar to rest against bare skin.

"You realize I'm going to change back eventually? We don't know when, just however long the 'Season of Change' is supposed to last. It's been four months and Dr. Parrish is still…" Rodney paused.

"Yeah, I know. The linguists are working on the translation. Guess it's taking so long because it's a language no one's seen before."

John slowly started rubbing soothing circles over Rodney's collarbone.

"It really doesn't bother you that my… that I'm….Rodney paused again.

If John thought Rodney's glare could make bold men weep, it was nothing compared to having lady McKay staring up at him, hands on her hips and a speculative glint in her eyes.

"You're like a 27 on the Kinsey scale aren't you. I should have known. What's your criteria? Willing and breathing? Oh, never mind. If you can handle it, I can handle it. Well?" Rodney started unbuttoning John's shirt. "What are you waiting for? Handle it already."

It wasn't the time to tell her that John would take him – her – any way he could get her...him, oh, fuck it. John had more pressing things to care about than pronouns because Rodney's sweet mouth was turned up and waiting.

~~~~

Good, good, so goooood. John dipped his tongue in again, deeper this time. Rodney's moans were muffled in his ears because he had his thighs clamped against John's head. His fingers were wound into John's hair, holding him there as if John had some intention of leaving. Like that was going to happen now he finally had Rodney under him. John took a breath and dove in again.

"John, John, Jo..hn." Rodney's back arched for the third time in the last twenty minutes. He tried holding onto John but his new body betrayed him as his thighs fell open, still trembling in reaction.

John raised his head and grinned, his cheeks and chin still wet with the evidence of Rodney's satisfaction.

"I want…"

"I know what you want, McKay."

"Fine, be smug. Just remember who you're deflowering here."

Fuck. John gripped the base of his cock and squeezed. Hard. If Rodney kept being so…Rodney, John was going to have bruises on his cock by tomorrow.

Rodney was all lush, warm skin. Like this, he was John's to explore. He was curves, and shadows, and a soft, hot, pulse that John wanted to bury himself in. It made John a little crazy the way Rodney's quiet moans and hitching breath were such a sheer honest response to him. Rodney didn't seem to know how to hold anything back.

Yeah, it was worth it.

"C'mere. You get on top. That way you can…"

"I got it. Angle and force of pressure. Good thinking."

John blinked. Well, he had been thinking it was a better way to get his hands and mouth on Rodney's breasts but – what the hell, he'd just show Rodney instead.

With Rodney poised over him, it was easy for John to run his fingertips over the pale mark on Rodney's breast. "Did it hurt?"

"You have no idea how much."

"But it's better now?"

Rodney swallowed. "Yeah, that's um, helping."

"How about this?" John put his mouth over Rodney's nipple, first teasing it with his tongue before suckling on it with tender care. Rodney's unladylike grunt was all the encouragement he needed. John began to lavish his attention first on one nipple and then the other while Rodney lost it, moaning and grinding his pussy down hard against John's bare thigh.

"Tell me."

"What?! What John?" Rodney whined.

"Tell me you're going to blow up the Temple of Doom."

"Yes, yes. Just as soon as I change back."

"How? Describe it to me," John demanded as he held Rodney's hips down, giving him more friction and more skin to rub against. He buried his face in Rodney's breasts, breathing in his scent. God, Rodney still smelled like Rodney and John was desperate for it.

"It, it will be big. I'll… oh god damn it, do that again -- fuck, yessss"

Rodney collapsed forward on to John's chest. He looked utterly wrecked, blinking up at John through eyelashes damp with tears, he'd come so hard.

" I…I'll use a naqahdah generator."

"Yeah, Rodney, do it." John was panting now. Rodney had gotten one of his hands around John's cock and was doing some of his own exploring.

"Damn it, I'm used to having bigger hands to do this with. Is it okay?"

"It's good, keep going."

"I'll use one of the Mark IVs.

John groaned. He was leaking all over Rodney's hand now.

"I swear, John, there'll be nothing left but dust after that baby goes off. It will be like taking out a Wraith Hiveship."

John moaned helplessly, giving it over to Rodney now, letting Rodney jack him off, hard and tight; giving John exactly what he needed.

"Anyone within 200 miles will be deaf for days, it will be so loud." Rodney whispered, low and intimate.

It was Rodney that held John now. It was Rodney that used his own wetness to work his thumb into John's ass. It was Rodney John hung onto as he shuddered and came with Rodney's next words.

"John, I promise you, the explosion will light up the sky for a thousand miles."

~~~~

They curled together on Rodney's bed, hot, sticky, and thoroughly spent. At least, that's how John felt, and Rodney looked completely undone. They'd only made it through a couple of things on Rodney's vagina list and John couldn't wait to get to the rest of it. He also had a crazy, tender urge to smooth the sweaty strands of hair back from Rodney's brow.

Maybe he'd try that later when he was sure Rodney wouldn't slap his hand.

"John?"

"Hmmm?"

"What happens when I turn back?"

John pulled Rodney's body closer and nuzzled at his ear.

"Don't worry about it." He slid a hand between Rodney's legs, and slipped two fingers into loose, wet heat. "I heard from a very reliable source that I'm a Kinsey 27."

~*~


End file.
